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Oh, parenthood! You’ve waited nine months (or longer) to welcome your new bundle of joy, and in the blink of an eye, it’s time to go back to work and find balance as a new mum. The list of worries in your head is as long as your to-do list and at the top sits the question every mum asks - should I return to work or stay home?
While this is a very personal decision, there are a few considerations that can help you decide what’s best for you and your new family.
Define Your Idea Of Balance
To find balance and be satisfied with how you’re playing the role of mother, partner, friend, and employee, make your own definition of balance. For some, this might mean having help during the day with cleaning and cooking, being home for dinner five nights a week, and having weekends dedicated to family time.
For others, working motherhood might look different and include having time for friends, making home-cooked meals, and exercising every day. Before you start trying to attain balance, it’s essential to define what success looks like for you.
Trying to mold to society’s idea of balance is a recipe for disaster and will be more frustrating than freeing. Instead, when you create your own definition and ideals, you can attain the balance that’s right for you and your family.
See The Positives In Childcare
One of the most significant decisions new mums make is whether or not to use a children’s nursery for their little ones. There is no “right decision” for everyone and every mum or dad must decide what is best for their specific needs and situation.
If you decide to use a nursery, focus on the positives. Your child will be loved and cared for by someone who has chosen childcare as a profession. Their learning and development will be monitored and supported through each stage and they’ll likely make life-long friends.
To help the decision go more smoothly, do adequate research to find the best children’s nursery for your child and talk to other mums and dads who have recently gone through the process. Reach out to references and do a thorough site visit with your top two or three choices and see which one gives you the most peace of mind.
Last by not least, don’t be afraid to make a change if you discover something doesn’t feel right after a few weeks at the new place. It can take new parents several months to adjust to new schedules, commute times, and pick-up procedures to understand what’s best for the family.
Let Go Of The Guilt
Many mums carry overwhelming guilt from returning to work when their children are young, which impacts the joy you’ll get from embracing a new chapter in your life.
Choosing childcare does not make you any less important in your child’s life. Plus, your child will see your example of working hard and being a provider through first-hand experience. Give yourself plenty of time to adjust to the new normal and let go of any guilt you may have over wanting to continue your career or starting a new one.
Many joys come with working outside the home - one of which is the ability to be present with your child when you are together. Focus on quality time with one another instead of quantity and soak in the moments you have together. You’ll likely find that everyone is happier having embraced their own needs and coming together at the end of the day.
